


you wish i was your pound cake

by amosanguis



Series: author's fave [41]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Ellen Degeneres Show RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Coming Out, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Humor, OTP: No Not Without You, Politicians Shalt Not Use Steve's Name In Vain, Short & Sweet, Steve Rogers Is Not A Conservative, title from a song
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-23
Updated: 2014-10-23
Packaged: 2018-02-22 08:55:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2501918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amosanguis/pseuds/amosanguis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“And today, I’d like to welcome a very special guest: Captain America!” Ellen throws her arms up and out as Beyoncé’s <i>Star Spangled Man</i> begins to play.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you wish i was your pound cake

**Author's Note:**

> \--Title from “Flawless (Remix)” by Beyoncé ft. Nicki Minaj  
> \--Inspired by the political ads running right now.

-z-

 

“And today, I’d like to welcome a very special guest: Captain America!” Ellen throws her arms up and out as Beyoncé’s _Star Spangled Man_ begins to play.

Steve walks into the room, laughing at the song choice as he waves to the audience.  He turns to Ellen and scoops her up into a powerful hug.

“It’s so good to see you, Steve!” Ellen says, pulling back.  She squeezes his biceps through his Henley and adds, “All of you.”

 “You’re going to get me in trouble with Portia,” Steve laughs.

“She’s just jealous,” Ellen says as they both take their seats.  “Just this morning she tried to convince me it was Bring Your Spouse To Work Day.”

They both laugh.

“Now,” Ellen says, leaning forward, “I’ve been trying to get you on my show for months and I know you’re very busy with, you know, saving the world and stuff – so thank you for visiting on your day off.”

The crowd cheers and applauds and Steve just grins.

“It’s good to be here,” Steve says, he pauses before adding:  “Especially in light of recent events.”

 

-x-

 

(“What the fuck is this shit?” Steve shouts at the television.

“Conservative Ray Peat shares the same values as Captain America,” an old man in a dark navy suit was saying on the television.  “That’s why Ray Peat has voted three times to repeal Obamacare; he’s pro-life and knows how to stand up against the bullies in D.C.  Vote for Ray, vote for conservative Christian values – support Captain America.”

“What.  In the actual.  Fuck?” Steve snarled, on his feet and his fists clenched and shaking.

“When did you start endorsing politicians?” Clint asks.

“He doesn’t,” Bucky answers for Steve.  Clint looks at him and begins to inch towards the doorway, Bucky was far too still, his face far too blank.

“Buck,” Steve looked down, “we need to make that announcement.”  And then he’s reaches down to the coffee table and grabs his phone, he scrolls through his contacts list before tapping on a name.  Then he’s putting the phone to his ear.  “Ellen!” he says, “it’s Steve Rogers – look, I was wondering if you had a slot open on your show?”)

 

-x-

 

“So you never endorsed Ray Peat?” Ellen asks.

“I’d be setting myself up for failure, if I did,” Steve answers, a mischievous grin spreading across his face.

“What do you mean by that?” Ellen presses.

“Well Peat doesn’t want gay couples to get married right?” Steve says.  “I have a problem with that since I’m waiting for gay marriage to be legal in all states.”

“And why are you waiting?”

“Don’t you have the picture I sent you?”

“I don’t know, do we have that?” Ellen glances to the screen behind her – a picture of Tony being yelled at by Pepper and Bruce came up.  “Oh, wait, wrong one.”

“I like that one, too,” Steve says with a laugh.

“What did he do?” Ellen asks.

Steve shrugs.  “With Tony it could have been any number of things.  He’s a good guy but he’s hell to live with.”

“Ah, here we go,” Ellen says, the picture of Tony faded away and was replaced by a picture of Steve sitting on the floor, his back to the couch and a weapon disassembled around him.  He had a gun piece in one hand and was accepting a beer from Bucky in the other – Bucky leaning over and pressing his lips to Steve’s in an obviously sweet kiss.

 

-x-

 

#OPGetCapMarried starts trending worldwide only seconds after the segment airs.

 

-z-

 

End.


End file.
